Impossible is Impossible

This blog is my way of reflecting upon life. Life is about living and learning. As I live and learn I’m going to reflect upon this life I lead. Hopefully I'll offer something insightful with my postings. If you learn nothing else from me, know this that “impossible is impossible”.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Blah

I'm currently up checking e-mails, reading blogs, and forcing down a "Mango Acai Flavored Juice" (which kind of tastes like fruit juice, tomato juice, and what I imagine baby food might taste like, hey it supposed to be organic and healthy) when I should be in bed because I have to return to work on T.V. Hill tomorrow. HaHa that really is what they call where I work. Two of the three letter networks and the top ranked are up on T.V. Hill. The third ranked station which is a Fox/CW affiliate sits at the bottom of the hill, and the last placed other three letter network is in another part of town.

I just got back from a meeting to discuss two projects being developed by public media, philanthropic groups, and social change organizations. One is called The Masculinity Project which will eventually launch as a site which explores masculinity particularly in the African-American community. The other is called Where My Ladies At, which is looking to explore the relationships between black woman, their femininity, and hip-hop/pop culture.

Check em out and let me know what you think. My colleagues are looking to improve both projects so feedback is greatly appreciated.

-C. Nel

Sunday, July 27, 2008

I'm back in Baltimore until 5 a.m. tomorrow. Then I head to NYC for a two day meeting.
I just got back from Chicago about four hours ago. I attended the Unity Journalists of Color Convention over 4,000 journalists of color showed up to partake in workshops, seminars, parties, and a visit earlier today by presumptive Democratic Presidential nominee Senator Barack Obama.

So here's a quick breakdown of the highlight of my seven days in the Chi.

Sunday: Attended a reception with the student journalists who were covering the convention. Check out their work at www.unitynews.org

Monday: Saw the student newsroom, met up with my friends for lunch, hung out.

Tuesday: Attended an all day meeting, attended some receptions, had pizza at Giordano's

Wednesday: Saw so many student's, hit up the career fair, met up with an old friend from high school and attended bar night in the hotel bar and saw everybody from famous anchors like CNN's T.J. Holmes, to famous magazine writers like Ellis Cose.

Thursday: I attended a press conference for student journalists with the President of Senegal and got to ask him a question. Went to a gazillion events including the party of all parties. But guess what I did. I fell asleep on the club couch in baby V.I.P. cause yeah we couldn't get put in real V.I.P. cause all the sports people (ESPN mostly) people like Stephen A. were up there.

Friday: I hosted a workshop, attended a dinner for the President of Senegal, went to another party, notice a theme here. Then went to bed.

Saturday: I hosted another workshop, went to another party, and kind of sort of went to bed at 3:30, even though I had to wake up at 6:45 for a meeting at 7:30.

Sunday: Woke up, packed, checked out of the hotel, went to the meeting, went to see Senator Obama speak, went back to the hotel to say goodbye to my friends, ate lunch, went to the hotel.
I'm exhausted and its making my body ache. So I'm about to go to bed before my 3:00am wake up call.

As always it was good to see my friends but an average of 3 hours of sleep per night is a tad too much.

I'll holla later.

TTYL,
C. Nel

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Awwwwww

Today's one of those days when I just want to scream.

I'm a tad bit overwhelmed.

Yesterday was my last day of work for a while, I successfully completed a week in the web, don't get it twisted I'll still be working.

Tomorrow I head to Chicago for 7 days for Unity: Journalists of Color Convention. I'm looking forward to it although my schedule will be tighter than some spandex. I'm looking forward to seeing friends, and even getting a chance to do a workshop or two or three (see them not moderate).

Then I come back to Bmore for less than 12 hours, and then I head to NYC for a meeting for two days.

Then it's back to work on July 30th.

But before that I'm trying to fill out the FAFSA, but I can't find my federal tax forms, you can't view them online, and I really don't have time to order a transcript of them. Awwww. That blows.

Then I have to go to the cleaners.

Then I have to go to the A.T.M.

Then I still have to pack.

Yeah I'm one of those one's who throws stuff in a suitcase as long as it matches.

A friend suggested I type out my wardrobe for every day of my trip. For a scatterbrain like me that's more of a reason to not pack.

Wish me luck.

If I get Internet in Chi I'll blog. If not maybe I'll remember how to Utter haha.

Peace.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

2-0

So I survived day two at the office.

Yesterday was my first day as an employee of one of the local T.V. stations. It was a pretty easy day. They put me right to work helping to update the website. It's great because I wanted to learn web when I began my failed internship this past January. So I mastered most of the technology in one day and we know I'm a bit of a technophobe. I just have to work on improving my writing, but there's always a need to get better. The big boss of the department is super helpful. There others are alright. Also I talked to the Assistant News Director about my getting into grad school and she wants to see if we can work it out so I can work and go to school. The highlight of day one though was getting a note from "Sunshine" who I secretly (well not so secretly now) refer to as Latest Wife. She apologized for us not connecting on my birthday, and remembered it was my first day at work, so she wished me well. Knowing that she was thinking of me made my day.

Today was great because I showed up early and left on time.

I have three more days and then it's off to Chicago for seven days to attend the Unity: Journalists of Color Convention. After that it's back home for a few hours to sleep and then it's off to NYC for a two day meeting, and then back to Bmore and back at the station.

Life is getting busier and busier.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Someone Wrote

Someone wrote this simply based off of words that I wrote. Something that I typed, something I said, something which resonated with them, and something which allowed us to connect if only on a surface level...

"your mother is awesome for raising a man like you...seriously..."

It stopped me dead in my tracks.

It makes you think, the power of our words, and the power of our roots, and how we're connected.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Words of the Week

This weeks words begin with some words from me.

Last night I was in one room checking e-mail and Facebook. The Future Doc was in another room watching "The Color Purple" which I've seen a zillion times and even read the books. During a commercial the Future Doc walks in and asks, "So when are they gonna say, "Eat the cake, Anna Mae?" That was a priceless moment and recounting of one of the greatest movie quotes ever. There are others. Enjoy and have a great week.

Sunday- Nettie: Nothing but death can keep me from it.
-The Color Purple

Monday- Carrie Bradshaw: And we were dressed from head to toe in love... the only label that never goes out of style.
-Sex and the City

Tuesday- Christopher Gardner: I met my father for the first time when I was 28 years old. I made up my mind that when I had children, my children were going to know who their father was.
-The Pursuit of Happyness

Wednesday- James Farmer Jr.: We do what we have to do in order to do what we want to do.
-The Great Debaters

Thursday- Eve: Memory is a selection of images, some elusive, others printed indelibly on the brain.
-Eve’s Bayou

Friday- Lee Plenty: You know what they say, "No women; no cry."
-Hav Plenty

Saturday- Hitch: Like I always tell my clients - begin each day as if it were on purpose.
-Hitch

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Life Rolls On

So right now I'm in Philly with the future doc.

He drove up yesterday and wanted company so I told him I would come up with him.

Today we did some sightseeing and visited those sites that before he was too busy to visit like L.O.V.E Park, the Philadelphia Museum of Art where the Rocky steps are, and the Reading Terminal Market. And yes we had Philly cheeseteak's. Yes to the provolone and onions. We also met up with two of his friends from undergrad and one of their boyfriends. So I spent the afternoon with four future black doctors we're 13% of the population, and something horrid like 5% of the doctors according to black doctors. So think about my being the presence of 4 of that 5%, that's major.

We're driving back tomorrow afternoon. He has to work on Monday and I start my new job.

I now have received another blessing. No not the car I so desperately need. I got into grad school. I don't know yet if I'm going because I still have to apply for financial aid. I also still have to see what my bosses at the T.V. station say about it.

Oh and it's one of those great institutions in the nation's capitol. I'll announce it soon, I think. :-)

But the letter was definitely a spirit booster. It's always good to know you're qualified and that someone somewhere says you're wanted and that you're worthy!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

WTF Jesse?

I'm trying to think have I ever said I wanted to cut another man's balls off? I went to an all boy's school and lived in an all boy's dorm for a combined seven years, so there was ample opportunity for such an utterance. I can't recall an instance in which someone has said and I hope no one has ever said they wanted to cut my balls off.



Anyway, I find Rev. Jesse Jackson Sr.'s comment disturbing. Did he feel Obama was so out of line he felt the need to castigate him? Aha or maybe he saw Obama's comments as "hitting below the belt", so therefore he felt the need to get him back.



To me this gaffe signifies the need for a new generation of leaders to emerge and further the civil rights agenda. Maybe it's time that we claim our inheritance. I contend that there is a great need for civil rights activists, and a great need for social activism from the local level to the national level. The only thing is these leaders should emerge from a new generation. I think a great deal of untapped potentail exists within what may be our "greatest generation." Only in this case those leaders in my view need to have been born between the year's 1960 and 1987. There enlies what I think can be a great generation of leaders who build on the legacy of the great Civil Rights movement while furthering an agenda which addresses the realities of our life.



When I think to who those leaders will be? I wonder if they'll be among them. What are our prospects? There are just a few folks on my radar screen.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Is This A Sign That I'm Getting Old?

Is this a sign that I'm getting old that when a birthday is just another birthday?

I'm now 22.

I don't feel any different. Am I supposed to?

Is 22 just a random age?

But I am grateful to live to fight another day.

Today is the anniversary of my birth.

My mother says its my real birthday because I was born 22 years ago on a Tuesday.

And I'll leave you with the lyrics of Shirley Horn's "Here's To Life"

NO COMPLAINTS AND NO REGRETS.
I STILL BELIEVE IN CHASING DREAMS AND PLACING BETS.
BUT I HAVE LEARNED THAT ALL YOU GIVE IS ALL YOU GET, SO GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT.
I HAD MY SHARE, I DRANK MY FILL, AND EVEN THOUGH I’M SATISFIED I’M HUNGRY STILL TO SEE WHAT’S DOWN ANOTHER ROAD, BEYOND A HILL AND DO IT ALL AGAIN.
SO HERE’S TO LIFE AND ALL THE JOY IT BRINGS.

HERE’S TO LIFE THE DREAMERS AND THEIR DREAMS.
FUNNY HOW THE TIME JUST FLIES.
HOW LOVE CAN TURN FROM WARM HELLOS TO SAD GOODBYES AND LEAVE YOU WITH THE MEMORIES YOU’VE MEMORIZED TO KEEP YOUR WINTERS WARM.
THERE’S NO YES IN YESTERDAY.
AND WHO KNOWS WHAT TOMORROW BRINGS OR TAKES AWAY.
AS LONG AS I’M STILL IN THE GAME I WANT TO PLAY FOR LAUGHS, FOR LIFE, FOR LOVE.

SO HERE’S TO LIFE AND ALL THE JOY IT BRINGS.
HERE’S TO LIFE, THE DREAMERS AND THEIR DREAMS.
MAY ALL YOUR STORMS BE WEATHERED, AND ALL THAT’S GOOD GET BETTER.
HERE’S TO LIFE, HERE’S TO LOVE, HERE’S TO YOU.
MAY ALL YOUR STORMS BE WEATHERED, AND ALL THAT'S GOOD GET BETTER.
HERE'S TO LIFE, HERE'S TO LOVE, HERE'S TO YOU.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Words of the Week

Sunday- "An important part of being a spiritual person is living a grateful life." -Unknown

Monday- "Age does not protect you from love but love to some extent protects you from age." -Jeanne Moreau

Tuesday- "True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.” -Arthur Ashe

Wednesday- "So that's the dissenter's hope: that they are writing not for today but for tomorrow.' - Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Thursday- "If you don't understand yourself you don't understand anybody else." -Nikki Giovanni

Friday- "I decided I can't pay a person to rewind time, so I may as well get over it." -Serena Williams

Saturday- "I was brought up to believe that the only thing worth doing was to add to the sum of accurate information in the world. " - Margaret Mead

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Contemplations

I would first like to thank all my lovely readers for the shot outs and congrats, you all are the best.


This morning I said to myself "Self you know what? Just a few weeks later than all your friends life after graduation is FINALLY about to begin for you." And I'm assuming that after today it goes a little something like this and that I have some of the following revelations:


a) Realize that I need to get on a bedtime and stop staying up making sure I see reruns of "A Different World" or "Living Single" or "Half & Half" on whatever's on TV One, or ABC News Now (which comes on somewhere between 3:30 and 4:30am and is news for insomniacs).


b) Realize that I should not be waking up to "Cash Cab" or whatever else is on TLC


c) Which means I should probably develop a normal sleeping pattern (which includes atleast 7 hours)


d) And a normal eating pattern (which includes 3 meals)

My thinking is also that I need to add regular exercise to the mix. For a few weeks I was walking atleast 30 minutes a few times a week. I need to get back to getting my workout on and add some weights to that.


Today was pretty exciting in terms of some of the following: I borrowed my aunts car cause she's out of town and everyone should know I drive sparingly so I had to test the theory that driving is like riding a bike you never forget. Did I ever tell ya'll I can't ride a bike? That's one reasons I can't have kids there are so many random daddy things that I lack. But I digress. So, I to drive to the station to fill out paperwork such as tax forms, the per diem worker agreement (which basically says my job is not secure but I can't let that rain on my parade). I also posed for my ID picture and I looked fly, had me saying damn I'm one sexy mofo. HaHa. No for real the pic was way better than even the driver's license picture. I also talked to my boss whose a black woman by the way (bonus pts she's my first boss in T.V. whose of color) and she told me it took them nearly a month to decide to offer me the gig because everyone went on vacation (the News Director, the Assistant News Director, my boss whose the Assignment Manager). She said they were a little concerned because when they made the offer yesterday I didn't sound excited in fact at first when she said it I paused (that was me thinking a) do I make them wait or b) do I say 'no' because I feel like I'm their fallback guy). It turns out I was their first choice. Also my direct super who I thought hated me seemed real hype as she walked me through the station today. Then I got introduced to some of the co-workers including a few reporters and anchors. Then I drove home and since I'm not used to driving myself home or anywhere else for that matter it felt so weird. Now that I think about it I was on that happy high you know when you feel all euphoric cause you're just so pleased with yourself. I hope I didn't run any red light cameras. The cops didn't stop me.


So next up for me is start the car hunt. Since my job could end up sending me somewhere else I don't think it smart to sign a lease so I'm going to get a car first which I'll likely need in case they make me work overnights and public transportation becomes unreliable and then the apartment will come later once I know more.


I talked to all three besties either by phone, text, or in person. I think they're so glad that I can finally stop freaking out about not having a job. One bestie though think it's time for me to make dating a priority because I have a J.O.B. I start July 14th then a week later head to Chicago for 7 days and then I think NYC for 2 for business. I have no time to breathe nevermind start a relationship. I'm like whatevs.


But that's all for now.


G'nite

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Employed

It feels so good to say this but I'm finally employed.

I'll be a broadcast apprentice at a local television station beginning in two weeks.

It's exciting to finally be beginning my career.

I didn't quite know what was in store for me a career in television, a career as a teacher, becoming a career student, or something from another realm.

I'll have a slightly different view than I imagined the second one instead of the first.

But I'm just so happy to be taking the steps towards becoming a full-fledged adult.