It's Been Too Long

It's been too long since I've written.

R.A. training has consumed my life.

I've been waking up by 7 every morning, and then going to bed around 2am the next morning.

On Monday and Tuesday of this week we were going through workshops and trainings for how to document (write someone up) for violating the school code of conduct, and also trained on how to help console people who happen to be confronting issues which make affect their well-being.

There's so much I have to do between now and tomorrow.

I have to put up a bulletin board which hasn't been delivered yet.

I also have NABJ stuff that needs to be handled.

Pray I get it done.

Hopefully we'll return to regularly scheduled programming by Saturday.

-CNEL

What in the hell ...

So have you ever had one of those moments when you think:

"What in the hell did I get myself into?"

Whew the balancing act I'm about to have to perform from now until May.

Whew. I may have said law in the back pocket, but I need the scales of justice, to balance my everything.

I came back to campus on Sunday night with two duffle bags full of clothes, sheets, and stuff that could be packed into duffle bags.

I also had my backpack full of papers for the ASSOCIATION and my new duties as STUDENT REP.

My toiletry bag. (Got to stay fresh in the face of stress. Though I need my good kicks cause the ones I'm wearing ummmm not so fresh. But remember its all in how you carry the swagger! So if I look good wearing em the old kicks will get kicked up a notch as far as freshness.)

&

I also had my pillow (Though I will not sleep until Sept. 1).

I'm a Resident Assistant, in a brand new dorm, for first-year students (we give them more dignity than calling them freshman).

The dorm isn't complete but my room is, minus jacked up internet.

I'm writing this from a hallway with large glass windows which overlook the library (also under construction).

Saw the cuddle buddy like 5 times today. Is that torture for me being well me? Really need to cut her off. We will not progress well past me being that ear, that shoulder, that voice, that meal card, and it sucks. Maybe part of my experience will be the first-year when I just let IT go. I just let go of the ill-advised attachment to people. I often preach reciprocity but am reluctant to say goodbye to people who add nothing to me.

I'm not reminiscing
I'm living
In this moment
I am moving
Far because the worst is far behind me
I am leaving the resentment
I'm releasing all the tension
Cause it's finally about me

From Kelly Rowland's "Better Without You"

I need an uncomplicated life where I can just do what needs to be done.

Words of the Week

Sunday- There is nothing in life from which we can't recover. -Susan L. Taylor
Monday- What other people may be a little nervous to do and nervous to accept, I can do. -Lauryn Hill
Tuesday- Know who you are before they have to tell you. -Wolof Proverb
Wednesday- Who are you really? Who are you when nobody is looking. That is the real you. -T.D. Jakes
Thursday- Work on your reputation until it is established, when it is established, it will work for you. -Unknown
Friday- People might not listen when you talk, but they can't help it when you sing. So get the world to sing your song. - Harry Belafonte
Saturday- Values can actually enhance value. -Unknown

Perspective

I'm incredibly tired.

I'm still processing all that happened during that nearly three month stay in east central Illinois.

Yes, completing that internship was necessary. It was also brave, risky, and smart all those things I've had to be before in my life. It's just this time I had to think about it, I had to think before taking a risk or being brave. I'm learning though that as you get older you learn that each decision has a definite impact. You learn to plot, plan, and strategize. I think careful discernment, that it's part of that awesome thing which I constantly endeavor to encounter called wisdom.

It's amazing though that the necessity of the internship came out of being faced with rejection by my beloved association. I applied for Student Projects on multiple occassions, and didn't get it. I applied for the internship I didn't get it. What that let me know was to not to think it was something wrong on their part. It taught me I hadn't yet done enough on mine. I either wasn't as prepared or didn't have as much experience as the others. The thing is however I knew I could compete.

That saying I posted here weeks ago, "Don't be motivated by success, be motivated by challenge" or something to that affect. It has new meaning now.

I'm now Student Representative an advocate for over 1,200 college students and nearly 60 high school students. I'm charged with helping prepare others. It'll also be a way to motivate myself.

No I didn't put no money in the machine I just had like NO pictures of myself.

So Sen. Clinton I think I was paying more attention to Suzanne's legs.

Sen. Obama showed up too. On CP time no less.

I showed this pic to a friend. Friend: "Oh wow you met Drucilla."

Me: "Yes, and her real name is Victoria Rowell.

Her new book is called "The Women Who Raised Me"

I got my copy

WRC, NBC 4's Jim Vance, evening co-anchor

Access Hollywood's Shaun Robinson about to make me write my own modern day version of " The Graduate"

Bmore Stand Up: CBS News Chief National Correspondent Byron Pitts (Bmore Native)

MY THANKS AS WELL FOR ALL THE CONGRATS. YA'LL HOLD ME DOWN.

P.S. I finally find a way to merge my passions being Student Rep duh it allows me to work with my fellow young people, do diversity work, and journalism. My passion for law will have to trasnform itself into equity and justice in the media. Hey law is all about equity & justice, right? Riiiiiiiiight.

Peace,

CNEL

VICTORY IS MINE

Victory is mine.

Victory is mine.

Victory today is mine.

I won my election.

The new Student Representative is yours truly.

Thanks to my supporters.

Bmore stand up.

:-)

-CNEL

Bon Voyage (Ain't That What They Say?)

I am about to leave for Vegas...once I change into a suit and get my ASS to the airport.

I need an escape.

I saw my best female friend aka "little sister" yesterday. Who'd she bring up "Harvard Girl".
What day did she feel the need to mention? The day "Harvard Girl" returned to Bmore. Who'd she give that I'm dropping a hint sideways glance to? Well duh me.

I saw a friend from high school and who came up "Harvard Girl".

I saw a friend from the board I used to serve on, who'd it make me think of "Harvard Girl".

I do not need reminders of one of few areas in my life where I haven't come into my own.

I DO NOT NEED TO BE REMINDED THAT I'M SINGLE. That makes me scream inside my head "No shit Sherlock!"

I don't need to be reminded that I am not yet fully contented with my life.

Let's go figure out what career path I'll be pursuing. Maybe that will take my mind off of HER.

She and I don't seem like we're going to be.

P.S.
I am discovering I'm have issues. HaHa. Well anyway issues about having grown up fatherless. Issues that make me seem somewhat bitter. More on that maybe in a future post. If I decide to think about it more.

WISH ME LUCK IN VEGAS. Maybe I'll decide what I want to be doing in a year with my life after college graduation.

Have a great rest of the week.

-CNEL

WORDS OF THE WEEK

Sunday- "It's not thy Thingdom come, but thy Kingdom come. Seek something higher." -Rudy Dee

Monday- "Nothing's free."- Mark Harmon

Tuesday- "Leaders are nourished by misfortune."-Unknown

Wednesday- "Don't hurt yourself on the way to where you're going." -Unknown

Thursday- "The high trees get the wind." - Unknown

Friday- "Life is a stage and we are all actors in a play called life. We write our own script and revise it as we please." -Rev. Run

Saturday- "When you're taken for granted, you're taken."-Unknown

Looking Back: The Internship Part 3

First Story As A Reporter: Anniversary of a 100 Year Old Tornado



Last Story As A Reporter: Baglefest

A story about a local festival sponsored by Lender's Bagels in a nearby city.



Favorite Story to Report: "See Your Solider"

A story about how the a program was founded which helps soliders and their families communicate via videophone.



Favorite Story to Read as an Anchor: "World's Tallest Horse"

A story about a group of people trying to set a world record for the tallest horse.



Favorite Content Job: Producer



Favorite Production Job: Floor Manager



Favorite Quote: (Tie) "That was a pun not intended in a pun based atmosphere." -Zach on News Writing

"You need to gain control." -Mimi on Workplace Behavior

" Now I know how Doug Funny must have felt when he was crushing on Patty Mayonnaise."- Zach on Girls



Favorite Story about Work: Hearing how the co-workers had intended to jokingly blame me for having to retape a cut-in I anchored. They decided not to, because I have a reputation for going off when provoked. It seems they learned not to test my gangsta. I admit I can be a bit of an Il Divo (Male Diva).



Favorite Story Non-Work Related: MY BIRTHDAY Nothing beats hearing about my funny acts on my birthday such as reviving my high school trademark dance: my rendition of the Beyonce booty dance. Then hearing how after having my birthday celebration I fell asleep in a bathroom leaning up against the shower. Then being told it was time to leave so hearing I jumped up, told everyone I had fun, and walked out to the car. Then hearing about my critiques and criticism of the co-workers. Then hearing about my random rants. But even better remembering all of it myself, those things I didn't say and didn't do.



Favorite Breakfast: The oatmeal I made myself twice.



Favorite Lunch: Taco Salad minus green olives and ground beef, with grilled chicken and ranch dressing



Favorite Dinner: Spaghetti made by my roommate Matt



Favorite Desert: Chocolate Chip Cookies made my roommate Matt



Favorite Work Snack: Grandma's Fudge Chocolate Chip Cookies



Favorite Non-Alcoholic Drink: Root Beer



Favorite Alcoholic Drink: SoCo and Lime



LEAST FAVORITE MOMENTS:

Letting my temper get the best of me =

GOING OFF IN THE NEWSROOM.

DEVELOPING A CRUSH.

FEELING THE NEED TO PUNCH DIFFERENT CO-WORKERS.

SPENDING TIME PLOTTING TO HELP QUICKEN KARMA.

Looking Back : The Internship Part 2

Thumbs



Thumbs Up:

• Proving to myself that I still have "it" : I take to heart what the fact that the bosslady said I have solid producing skills, and solid reporting skills. I also remember her saying, "You have presence. You look good, you have great teeth (W/E I def need braces), and a great smile." She also says my writing improvd a great deal over the summer.


• Branching out : When I consulted J she said to do it. She told me to take the internship to inherit risks, but to focus on opportunity. She insisted I show that I can rock and roll in a foreign situation.


• Reporting the news: Informing the public is a privilege as well as a responsibility. I enjoyed covering a variety of stories from the "See Your Soldier" videoconferencing between soldiers and their families, to the story about "Geocaching" a high tech treasure hunt.


• Meeting Some Incredible People: There were definitely times where I wore by Bmore city mean mug. There were times when I got downright hood. But there were times when I smiled. On the drive back at smiled at some of the funnier moments. I smiled at all the notes I found in my pockets following one on one note pacing with Mimi especially when we co-produced. I smiled at where I woke up the morning of my 21st birthday, there's a story for the never to be begotten grandkids. I smiled at how Wilkey cried when we prepared to say goodbye. She recounted me calling her "Milkey Way". I was inebriated and Wilkey must have given way to "Milkey Way". I smiled thinking of catching up with my cuddle buddy.

Thumbs Down

THESE ARE GENERAL ONES THAT OTHERS IN THE INDUSTRY NOT JUST INTERNS I THINK ARE GENERALLY PRETTY UPSET ABOUT.

Lack of Pay: It's so not cool I made probably less than 1/6 of what I made the last three summers interning. Why am I not paid an amount commensurate with the work that I do or given my skill level.

Being Away From Family and Friends: Having to sacrifice and forego milestones. It's the second summer I've missed the high school graduation of many of my babies. I miss one of the two best friend's college graduations. I missed a lot of graduation parties.

Ridiculous Stories: Sometimes we cover straight up ridiculous stories. Other times we cover stories where you just wonder what the prevalence is to the audience.

Lack of Diversity: 3 African-Americans in a newsroom of 15 or so unacceptable.

*TIE

Location: Another reason the lack of diversity was devastating. We were an hour away from a city of 200,000 or more. We were 3 hours away from a city of more than 500,000. Yay for small towns they sustain the American way of life, but umm for college students who need the benefit of having a social life, that is almost cruel and unusual punishment especially for a city boy.

Lack of Cupcakable or Boolovable Girls: Dating in the workplace aka dating co-workers is tacky, I think. Dating one of the only other African-Americans even more tacky. But if you're going to spend most of your time somewhere, there can atleast be some eye candy.

Looking Back: The Internship Pt. 1

I arrived in Chucktown on May 12 around 7pm, CST.

I left Chucktown on August 3 around 8pm, CST.

My departure was just a week shy of three months.

I arrived back in Baltimore on August 4 at about 9:30am, EST.

During the course of the internship I learned a lot.

I reflected a lot about my choice of vocation.

Still I wonder if I've chosen a vocation where "my great joy" will "meet the world's great need."
I heard that in a speech by the Rev. Peter J. Gomes back when I was in high school. He said rather profoundly and articulately, "Vocation is where your great joy meets the world's great need." Those words have stuck with me over the course of nearly four more years.

It's wild because one of the first things I did upon arriving this morning was to text and call my friends to arrange a ride to one friend's "trunk party". Apparently that's the in thing to do, to buy a big trunk, to provide food, drink, and music, and to invite people to fill your trunk with school supplies and dorm essentials. Cool idea my loves, but I'm broke! :-) Seeing my babies (member of '07 a few of whom I had lunch with nearly everyday of their freshman year). It feels like I'm seeing my kids off. I've seen the young men and women grow, blossom, and mature. It's surreal they are about to experience for themselves all they've been asking me about over the course of the last three years.

It's ironic that often I'm looked to for advice when I'm really still trying to find my way.

My middle school's motto was to prepare us to be "men for others."

My high school's motto was 'to do the greatest possible amount of good.'
They wanted us to focus on doing that by providing a place where we found, "joy in work, in play, and in the discovery and realization of personal potential."

My college's motto is "Strong Truths Well Lived" in hopes that we'll all become "Men and Women For Others".

There's the opportunity to be a broadcast news producer, to be a broadcast news reporter, and the eventual possibility that I'll be entrusted to anchor a newscast.

Then there are my other passions which involve passions for education, law, and social justice.

I believe I'm headed in the right path. I do believe I'm being called to be a journalist to chronicle people's stories, and effect change in that way.

I do believe I'm beging called ...

Fun and Funny Times

Journos and Blogging

http://weblogs.baltimoresun.com/features/dating/blog/

http://www.baltimoresun.com/hamiltonshabitat

How I'm Feeling ...

Josh (11:47:23 PM): how is everything
stormyc14 (11:40:32 PM): i'll be happy to go home
Josh (11:47:50 PM): cool
Josh (11:47:51 PM): its funny
Josh (11:47:53 PM): only baltimore
Josh (11:47:55 PM): when your here you cant wait to get away
stormyc14 (11:41:04 PM): lol
Josh (11:48:04 PM): but once you get away for too long your ready to come back home
stormyc14 (11:41:10 PM): lol
stormyc14 (11:41:14 PM): ain't that the truth