I Hate Hate Hate Packing

So I survived the Thanksgiving Holiday:

I really just chilled (saw family, finished watching my collection of "The Wire" on DVD, read through a pile of articles I'd printed off and wanted to read, conducted some interviews for a radio station project, tried my best to get over my crush on A.C. and despite the best of intentions I probably gained some dreaded lbs). I got my turkey salad sandwiches thanks to my mother, but I didn't get my apple pie. I'll handle that when I return from Seattle next week, apple pie is an all the time food, an American staple .

It's official I hate packing for trips because I'm never quite sure of what to pack. I've said it repeatedly that I'll get all Banana Republic when it counts, when I'm looking for the first job, until then I plan to scoot on by.

This year and the last few months in particular I've made nearly one trip a month to places which require me to board a plane.

So I'm off to this conference in Seattle tomorrow, and an e-mail I get tells me to bring two outfits which would classify as "cocktail attire" and I start to panic. First, I Google cocktail attire, cause I'm thinking nice shirt, nice slacks, and blazer, and some sites agree, and others say suit. Do I look like I feel like wearing a doggone suit? Is it that serious? When I think "cocktails" I think shouldn't even be there, cause I can't even drink legally. Having worn a school uniform for the first nine years of my educational career, having to wire a shirt, tie and slacks for the next four years during high schools, means I now love any moment I can dress down, which in college means all the time. I own like an untold number of jeans which suit me just fine. I'm a jeans and shirt kind of guy, and I spice it up when need be.

Also add this little dilemma to my headache. You see the day I headed home for break last week, I nearly burned down by dorm. My closet has two shelves for storing things and then a poll for hanging things. I was taking stuff out of the closet, and mistakenly let my comforter fall onto the light bulb. I did smell something burning but assumed something had spilled into the oven, and that someone was cooking. I walk over to the closet for something else, and I'm like "OH Sugar Honey Iced Tea" my comforter is burning!" Then I pull it out of the closet, drop it on the floor, and stomp the remaining flame out, and trash it. But there's this pervasive smell which I hope doesn't permeate my clothes. I don't have time to wash everything I'll need for the trip. Maybe I'll spray some Febreeze and keep my fingers crossed, and say one of my all the time silent prayers.

Oh and someone remind me to get a subscription to Details, GQ, or one of them magazines, so I can get a clue as to what colors look good on me. LoL. I used to be good at this when I had to be daper on the all the time basis, maybe I've gone too casual.

Also,please pray with me that 1) if it does snow in Seattle it doesn't stop me from making it there on time 2) the holiday travelers utilize the airport before or after my flight.

Words of Wisdom

Sunday-Seeing yourself as you want to be is the key to personal growth.-Unknown
Monday-Begin whatever you have to do: the beginning of a work stands for the whole.-Decimus Magnus Ausonius
Tuesday-Dedication is not what others expect of you, it is what you can give to others.-Unknown
Wednesday-Get out of the blocks, run your race, stay relaxed. If you run your race, you'll win. Channel your energy. Focus.-Carol Lewis
Thursday-Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.-Lou Holtz
Friday-Chance favors only the prepared mind.-Louis Pasteur
Saturday-Begin with the end in mind.-Stephen Covey
Bonus-We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.- Aristotle

FWB: Friends With Benefits

So little oh my me, was hosting on the radio as usual. It was my second to last show(s). Thus, I say the countdown till I reclaim part of my life, namely my Sunday's is in full effect. I didn't know I had many listeners because I was engulfed in a conversation about what to do about this crush I have, a story for another day. Anyways, a listener sent in a request. She wanted me to talk about the possibility of there ever being "Friends with Benefits."

Hmmm I thought to myself. Let me think about that, let me let it marinate for a minute.

So as a young black male, I know how difficult the dating situation is out there. It's kind of rough guys, take it from me.

FWB's defined as

The most accurate ones in my mind:
"Two friends who have a sexual realtionship without being emotionally involved. Typically two good friends who have casual sex without a monogomous relationship or any kind of commitment."

or

"A safe relationship, that mimics a real partnership but is void or greatly laking jealousy and other such emotions that come with a serious relationship."

or

"A physically involved relationship, where both partners enjoy some comforts of sitting on the fence between serious relationship and simple friendship."

or

"Any realtionship that can only be catagorized as being between Friends and Partners, also refered to as More then friends"

or

"Two people break up over complictaions of a serious relationship and decide to continue their relationship a step down, but not far enough as to have physical bounderies."

So here's my take:

The bottom line is we all want "love." We all want to feel as if we're wanted. We all want to feel that connectedness, that intimacy that comes when you're in a relationship with someone who respect, honor, and cherish you. Sometimes the trapping of the "title", the "expectation" that comes with being in a committed relationship complicates things. Sometimes people want to just be able to be free, to come and go as they please. So some people choose to be "FWB's" just to get that companionship, and that fulfillment that they need. Is it enough? Can it lead to more? Hmmm. I guess it depends on where the two people want it to go.

I myself never want to be just a "FWB", I'm more than a piece of meat, and I have sworn off "cuddle buddies" cause that is just a mess waiting to happen as we discussed here before.

Bottomline contentment doesn't come without clarity. It make time to get all those things that you want, and sometimes settling for something is better, than having nothing to hold onto. Well holding on to someone, whose going up and go, isn't my idea of contentment.

Hmm so when it comes "FWB"'s, I say tread carefully!

"Living History"

After this semester, I won't host a radio show anymore.

I am having fun doing these weekly commentaries entitled "Living History."

Here's the one I'll likely deliver tonight:

Growing up without a father, those who I depended upon most were the women in my life. Those women included my mother, my twin sister, my maternal grandmother, my aunts, my cousins, my teachers, and my close female friends. Long ago when I dreamed of the white picket fence, the wife, and the children I dreamed of daughters who were like the women already in my life. I dreamed of daughters who were beautiful not just in appearance, but also in spirit. I dreamed of daughters who were intelligent and whose intellect matched that of anyone who dared question their ability to succeed. I dreamed of daughters who more than just dreamed, who believed in the power of God, the power of family, and the power of love. And with those things I hoped that their hopes and aspirations for themselves would be sustained.

I once wrote about an amazing woman, a female superhero. The story was an ode to the women in my life, and a commenter said, "Yes, women do, do it all." And that has stuck with me, as I have grown more and been nurtured by women whose competence I’ve never questioned, whose skills I’ve always been able to depend upon. So when I saw that this country would finally have a woman who finally had a seat at the table, who in our American government could wear red and not just black, I got excited. I thought to myself finally the world will get to see, what I have already seen. The power of a woman to not just nurture, but to lead, to not just speak but to act.

And no woman should have to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders, but they do. They do it not because they necessarily want to, but because there is still sexism just as there is racism. There are still fears about having someone different sharing power, and sharing responsibility. When Baltimore born and bred Representative Nancy Pelosi ascends to the office of House Speaker she will be the highest ranking elected female in American history. She will have broken the proverbial "glass ceiling", but who among her will follow? Will we finally see the value in making sure our communities are inclusive, and are representative in the truest sense of the word? That is my hope. Because as we live, with each passing second, each passing minute, each passing hour, we are "living history".

Words of the Week

Sunday-"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
Mark Twain

Monday"-Put yourself in a state of mind where you say to yourself, "Here is an opportunity for me to celebrate like never before, my own power, my own ability to get myself to do whatever is necessary."
Anthony Robbins

Tuesday-"We are not makers of history. We are made by history."
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Wednesday-"A problem is a chance for you to do your best."
Duke Ellington

Thursday-"Don't settle for average. Bring your best to the moment. Then, whether it fails or succeeds, at least you know you gave all you had. We need to live the best that's in us."
Angela Bassett

Friday-"I am not a perfect servant. I am a public servant doing my best against the odds. As I develop and serve, be patient. God is not finished with me yet.""
Jesse Louis Jackson

Saturday- "Character is what you know you are, not what others think you have."
Marva Collins, African- American educator

Getting On My Nerves

"its easier to like ppl if u dont kno erything about them cuz they dont have the chance to get on your nerves"
-Grace O. per an AIM convo


Oh how true this statement is right now.

and here goes another

"There's always a hater in the room."
-Jalessa S. per discussion

You got to guard yourself against detractors, those who'd bring you down versus build you up.

So lately some people have said to me you seem different, you're acting funny.

I don't think I'm acting different.

I'm just living life, doing me, not worrying about people's nonsense.

I don't need any drama in my life.

Being me is a full time job, so I have little time for games. I'm just avoiding dealing with stupidity.

On another note, it feels so good to be taking back control.

So next semester I decided I'm not going to host shows for campus radio on the weekend, and after the current school year, I won't be news director at the campus radio station either. You see I have this problem. I'm a constant giver. I give so much of my time, energy, and effort, that is my talent. I might not be the smartest, most attractive person, but I am passionate and I am loyal. But I'm reclaiming something which I was so willing to give away, my time which I know now is a part of my treasure.

Oh and I've decided not to let crazy ppl get on my nerves, while let them kill my buzz, steal my joy. As one of my bestfriends says so often, "The devil is a liar."

Local football rivalries teach life lessons

Someone once said to me, a Baltimore native, "If you ask someone where they're from, they'll tell you where they graduated from high school. In Baltimore, it seems to matter more what high school you went to than anything else."
I took some time and thought about that statement, and discovered it to be quite true. On one Saturday in November, football is truly the talk of this town. If you're a public school alum, you're probably headed to the game between rivals Baltimore City College and Baltimore Polytechnic Institute. That game known today as the City-Poly game marks a cross-town rivalry that is 118 years strong. If you're a prep school alum, you want to see who comes out on top between McDonogh School and Gilman School. The rivarly has now gone on for 91 years. While there is certainly a lot of talk before the game, come game day, what happens on the field is all that matters.
The City College kids don orange and black, the Poly kids orange and blue. The McDonogh kids don orange and black also, and the Gilman kids blue and grey. In two separate parts of town -- generally uptown for the prep schools, and downtown for the public schools -- two games go on as if they were the last ones which the teams will ever play. At the end of the game day, two teams will walk away with their spirits lifted, and two with an added burden on their shoulders. This year, both teams who donned the orange and black were victorious. City reigned over Poly, and McDonogh held their ground against Gilman. As a McDonogh alum and friend to many City College alums, I can say I wore a smile. There is undoubtedly something special about that good old orange and black.
City, a public magnet school, is also known as the "Castle on the Hill." McDonogh, a prep school in suburban Baltimore, also sits up on a hill. Both places speak to tradition, legacy, and prestige. On this day, they speak to the importance of communal pride. Pride is not just worn by those who are victorious; pride is also worn by those who can only hope for victory. Rivalries like these are part of the all-American tradition in which competition, boosted by character and integrity, are so important. If there is anything we can learn from the old Baltimore tradition, it is that competition is a part of life. We don't hate the other team because they're the competition. We love the fact that they compel us to do better. We don't become arrogant when we win, we humble ourselves because the win was hard-fought. If we focus only on today's win, how can we prepare for tomorrow's victory?
I guess it's true that the prideful must be mindful. The best player is the one who starts every game with an even record or a clean slate.

The above was a letter to the editor, I recently had published in my school paper.

Words of the Week

Sunday-"Every people should be originators of their own destiny."
Martin Delany

Monday-"It isn't where you came from, it's where you're going that counts."
Ella Fitzgerald

Tuesday-"Question everything. Every stripe, every star, every word spoken. Everything."
J. Ernest Gaines

Wednesday-"The time is always right to do what is right."
Martin Luther King Jr.

Thursday-"No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow."
Alice Walker

Friday- "I was raised to believe that excellence is the best deterrent to racism or sexism. And that's how I operate my life."
Oprah Winfrey

Saturday-"You can't sway someone's opinion by argument, you have to do it by example."
Cuba Gooding Jr.

Affecting An Eternity

The further along I get in my studies, the closer I come to becoming an active journalist, the more I reflect on the blessings of the craft.

I wrote previously about my family's prediction that I'd somehow end up in the news business.

I've always had an affinity for T.V. news. When it came to local news there was the late Al Sanders who anchored alongside Denise Koch, then Vic Carter and Denise Koch. There was Stan Stovall and MaryBeth Marsden then Stan switched stations, and there was Stan and Donna Hamilton. There was also native Baltimorean Tony Harris, now with CNN. They were those who helped me to make sense of what happened in and around Baltimore.

Outside of Baltimore there was always a much bigger world, and for perspective on that I remember turning to and being comforted by the presence of Bryant Gumbel, Carole Simpson, and Ed Bradley. Make no mistake, being able to turn to people that look like you does put one more at ease.

So today as I sat watching CNN and heard it announced that CBS newsman Ed Bradley had died of leukemia, I was shocked. The consumate professional Ed Bradley had what broadcasters need to have male or female, black, white, or other: he had an ability to talk as well as listen, he had an ability to ask the questions we wanted to have answer, and those questions we didn't know we could ask. Ed Bradley had a quiet confidence, he had dignity, and he had grace, but he was also a tenacious journalist and a thorough interviewer.

Bradley started as a teacher, and as many of us know, teachers it is said "affect an eternity." He went on to be a reporter for radio, and finally a television reporter. As a journalist Ed Bradley most certainly affected an eternity. Many of us who consider journalism our calling, our life's work, and our form of public service, saw him as an able teacher who led by example. Those of us African-American men who want to call ourselves journalists, well we learned from Mr. Bradley that being a gentleman is also key to being a journalist.

A, B, C

You know how you feel like you take one survey, and you take em all. I definitely have probably done this one, but oh well. The below was taken from SPChrist.

A - Age: 20

B – Bible Verse: Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is assurance(substance) of things hoped for, proof(evidence) of things not seen." (Thanks to my maternal grandmother)

C - Career: Aspirant (aspiring journalist)

D – Drink?: I'm a minor, but when I dabbled in Italia zucchero e vodka (red grapefruit juice and vodka)

E - Easiest person/s to talk to: My cousin/namesake/god-sister Christina

F - Favorite song/s at the moment: "Heaven" by John Legend

G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Either

H - Holy or Heathen: Working to become more holy and get right with God.

I - Ideology: Live life unapologetically.

J - Junk food you like: Famous Amos

K - Kool-aid flavor: Now you know we mixed em tropical punch and orange

L - Longest car ride ever: Mmm prolly South Carolina 6 or 7 hours I think

M - My favorite Sport: Track and Field

N - Number of relationships you've had: One and done, ha. One which scarred me.

O - One wish you have: To become successful/contented.

P - Phobia: An unfulfilled life.

Q – Question you would most likely plead the 5th if asked: Who I'm interested in, cause that's fun to keep people guessing.

R - Reason to smile: My mother's inspirational e-mails

S - Scene of a movie you can't forget: The end of the movie "The Inkwell" which focused on Drew (Larenz Tate) a troubled teen coming of age. At the end of the movie while rejected by the prettiest girl in the black section of Martha's Vineyard aka "The Inkwell" Lauren (Jada Pinkett Smith) he wins the affection of Heather (A.J. Johnson) by terrorizing her unfaithful husband. Proving that good guys don't finish last Drew becomes a man thanks to Heather.

T- Time you woke up: 7:55 for my 8:00 class

U – Unluckiest moment in your life: Prolly elementary school when I was targeted by bullies.

V - Vegetable you hate: Squash/zucchini

W – Weather preference: Spring or early fall, 70 with a light breeze

X - X-rays you've had: None.

Y- Yummy food(s): Potatoes (mashed, potatoes and onions, french fries)

Z- Zodiac sign: Cancer

Voting

“The vote is the most powerful instrument ever devised by man for breaking down injustice and destroying the terrible walls which imprison men because they are different from other men.”
-Lyndon B. Johnson, the 36th President of the United States of America

“Voting is simply a way of determining which side is the stronger without putting it to the test of fighting”
-H.L. Mencken, Humorist and Journalist

In preparation for possible discussion in my Politics class tomorrow, and in antincipation of writing and anchoring a news update tomorrow, I'm switching between CNN and FOX News on this first Tuesday in November. The first Tuesday in November also known as election day.

All across the nation people have been given a charge. They have been asked to go out and cast their ballots. Some go to the polls knowing full well what they stand for and who they stand with. Others go not knowing much, except maybe what they stand against. Everyone who goes plays a role, and has a role in deciding the fate of the union. In a democracy as we know there are three branches of government the legislative, the executive, and the judiciary. They are supposed to make sure there is a balance of power. Locally we have a say in who serves in each branch, and nationally we have a say in who serves as members of the House and Senate, and as our President. Sometimes we feel truly contented, and other times we feel discontented. At the end of the day the right to suffrage is a right we must fight to preserve and protect. Voting makes the democracy a living and breathing thing, and not just a figment of our collective imaginations. At the end of the day voting is a right which needs exercise, like our physical body, it needs to get us moving.

As a journalist I'm watching, waiting, and intrigued by the process.

The New York Times's Elisabeth Bumiller once said, "I've said this for years if we (journalists) have any ideology, it's a love of conflict."

For journalists it doesn't get any better.

As a voter, I went to the polls today. I stood there, and tried to select people I thought would represent me well. I then read ballot measures, and hoped that I was voting in support of measures which would improve my community.

I thought long and hard about how politics has in effect become a game, but even if some choose to see it that way, there's a lot at stake.

I'm now part of the fourth estate, and I'm going to make sure the powers are balanced.

Words of the Week

Sunday-"Kindness should not be confused with submission."
-Author Unknown
Monday-"You got to look at things with the eye in your heart, not with the eye in your head."
-Lame Deer
Tuesday-"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence therefore is not an act but a habit."
-Author Unknown
Wednesday-"Sometimes we must smile through our sadness."
-Author Unknown
Thursday-"We live life blinded from seeing what's really there, but when we get those moments when we stop to consider life, it's the only time we really open up our eyes and see life as it is!"
-Author Unknown
Friday-" Most people have the will to win; few have the will to prepare to win."
Bobby Knight
Saturday-" What you learn in life doesn't matter as much as what you learn from life."
-Author Unknown

One.Two..Three...

This was taken by two of the stars of Ten95 Chris S. and Talia:

Three Names You Go By: Christopher, Chris, CNEL

Three Parts of Your Heritage: African-American, Caucasian American, Native American (Happy Native American Heritage Month)

3Three Things That Scare You: Failure, Dogs, Insects

Three of Your Everyday Essentials: Read some type of paper if only the front page, watch a few minutes of CNN, walk somewhere to clear my mind

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now: Sandals, t-shirt, pajama bottoms

Three of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists: Vivian Green, India.Arie, John Legend

Three of Your Favorite Songs: "Cursed" by Vivian Green, "Good Man" by India.Arie, "Each Day Gets Better" by John Legend

Three Things You Want in a Relationship: Authenicity, love, respect

Three Physical Things about the Opposite Sex: Eyes, smile, breasts (now why would I censure myself)

Three of Your Favorite Hobbies: Reading, writing, listening to music

Three Things You Want Really Badly Right Now: A.C. (haha that's a person), to be done with undergrad, a car (so I can take road trips)

Three People You Would Like to See Do This: It doesn't matter

Three Non-Physical Things About the Opposite Sex: Compassion, humility, loyalty

Three Favorite T.V. Shows: Grey's Anatomy, Girlfriends, Law and Order

Three Songs that you have listened to while completing this meme: None I'm watching Jack Cafferty on CNN

A Job Complete

Working in radio has been really interesting. It's a lot different than what I've done with print or television. As with all forms of journalism, it's an interesting mental and physical exercise.

Visit this site to hear my work with the professionals of NPR, National Public Radio,

http://www.npr.org/about/nextgen/college_media/index.html

Have a great end to your week.

-CNEL