What in the hell ...

So have you ever had one of those moments when you think:

"What in the hell did I get myself into?"

Whew the balancing act I'm about to have to perform from now until May.

Whew. I may have said law in the back pocket, but I need the scales of justice, to balance my everything.

I came back to campus on Sunday night with two duffle bags full of clothes, sheets, and stuff that could be packed into duffle bags.

I also had my backpack full of papers for the ASSOCIATION and my new duties as STUDENT REP.

My toiletry bag. (Got to stay fresh in the face of stress. Though I need my good kicks cause the ones I'm wearing ummmm not so fresh. But remember its all in how you carry the swagger! So if I look good wearing em the old kicks will get kicked up a notch as far as freshness.)

&

I also had my pillow (Though I will not sleep until Sept. 1).

I'm a Resident Assistant, in a brand new dorm, for first-year students (we give them more dignity than calling them freshman).

The dorm isn't complete but my room is, minus jacked up internet.

I'm writing this from a hallway with large glass windows which overlook the library (also under construction).

Saw the cuddle buddy like 5 times today. Is that torture for me being well me? Really need to cut her off. We will not progress well past me being that ear, that shoulder, that voice, that meal card, and it sucks. Maybe part of my experience will be the first-year when I just let IT go. I just let go of the ill-advised attachment to people. I often preach reciprocity but am reluctant to say goodbye to people who add nothing to me.

I'm not reminiscing
I'm living
In this moment
I am moving
Far because the worst is far behind me
I am leaving the resentment
I'm releasing all the tension
Cause it's finally about me

From Kelly Rowland's "Better Without You"

I need an uncomplicated life where I can just do what needs to be done.