What Other People Say

Someone said to me today, "You're very verbal." I couldn't tell if that meant, “I can tell you like to talk”, “you talk to much”, or “just shut up”. Anyway it reminded me that no matter what people are judging you. They’re sizing you up and forever holding up the invisible measuring stick. Try as we might to escape it, it’s virtually unavoidable. The glares, the stares, the confused looks, the sideways glances, the undecided faces abound. Tell me you haven’t noticed one or all of those expressions. As much as you tell yourself it doesn’t matter what they think, it sometimes does. But what can we do about it aside from simply living life?

The same person who made the previous observation told me that everyone who came to see him had a kind word to say about me. Knowing that people think highly of me, and that they think enough of me to in turn speak highly of makes me feel good. Why? Because it means that someone noticed that I try to live my life with authenticity and integrity.

No you don’t live your life for anyone else. You live your life for you, but you can’t avoid that sticky little detail. There are other people in the world too. So you might as well get used to the fact that there are other people in this world.

I call myself a great work in progress or sometimes “the” great work in progress. I’m mindful of the effect I have on people. We should all be mindful of this. We have the innate ability to impact people’s lives and to in some cases transform them. It’s sometimes a daunting task; other times a challenge, but always a responsibility. No one wants to take responsibility for anyone but himself or herself, but perhaps that’s the problem. My little cousin often walks into a room and asks, “Is Julia here?” One time I responded, “Do I look like I’m my sister’s keeper?” He looked at me like I was a fool, and you might see why he likes my twin sister more than he likes me me. But that’s aside from my main point point, the point is I’m my sister’s keeper, and my mother’s, and my cousin’s, and my friends. If we keep people it simply means that we’re mindful that they grow because of us or they falter because of us. I’d rather be judged to have had a positive impact on people and their lives rather than to have had simply no impact at all.