FOOT IN MOUTH ITIS

So while in the Beantown my colleagues and I had dinner at Morton's.

I ordered the crab cake BLT which was delish.

So when the waiter put down the wrong meal I did something really ignorant.

I made a sound that is often heard on game shows. It's the incorrect answer noise "ERRRRRNT" and I then said "Wrong" as I looked down at my plate.

I don't know what came over me.

Except to say that I often do that as a way of being funny when I don't agree with someone or don't appreciate something they've done. It's really intended to be a harmless joke.

One friend apologized on my behalf, as I instantly began laughing out of embarrassment.

My other friends who were sitting near me immediately burst into laughter.

I then tried profusely to apologize.


Then today at work we were supposed to switch shifts so I said to a co-worker Malik, "Go tell them heiffers I said come outside cause it's their turn."

Do you know ol boy went in and quoted me verbatim.

Two seconds later the big boss gets on walkie.

"Chris I heard you're out there referring to your female colleagues with some choice language."

I was dumbfounded.

"Ummm. Uh. I think that means I have to tell Malik about discretion. I didn't tell him to say that to everyone ... I didn't tell him to repeat me exactly. I just chose to use some colorful language," I said.

"I think all your language is colorful," the big boss said over walkie.

"Agreed," I said.

Embarrassed as hell. Shit, I thought. I have two weeks left and I need her as a reference. LoL.

But apparently she has a sense of humor because a) I wasn't fired b) apparently she laughed both times Malik said it c) apparently she stood laughing watching from a window as I stopped dead in my tracks.

So I'm just going to keep my mouth shut for a while.

The cold weather must be getting to me.