Oh S.ugar H.oney I.ced T.ea

"Oh shit, my mother."

Those were the words that came out of my mouth when I woke up, looked at the clock, and it read 9:52 AM

I was in deep trouble.

I was supposed to be up by 8:30 AM at the latest. I had set my alarm clock for 7:45 AM. I needed to iron my shirt, shower, and get dressed.

By the time I had woken up I didn't have time for any of the above.

I went to the bathroom looked in the mirror saw bloodshot eyes and quickly washed my face. (My mother would later say I did a poor job, I admit it was a rush job.)

I then went back into the room and threw on dress socks, my white shirt, and my blue patterned suit. Then I slipped into my dress shoes grabbed my cell phone, keys, and my ID card. Then I rushed out of the door.

Today is the first day of "Family Weekend". It's the weekend when parents and siblings converge on the college to give us all a little bit of home, I guess. Every year on the Saturday morning when "Family Weekend" begins the college holds it's annual Gratias Ceremony.

Each year during the ceremony student leaders from across the college are recognized by being inducted into leadership societies such as the Honor Council, the College Board on Discipline, the National Residence Hall Honorary. Awards are also given to student leaders who maintain extremely high GPA's, are heavily involved in community service, and who through their clubs and activities demonstrate that they desire to be well rounded students. Another honor is given to 14 seniors who are judged by faculty, administrators, and students to be the 14 top student leaders of the senior class. Those 14 become members of the Green and Grey Society. This year I was among that 14.

I still don't know why I was selected to be a member of the Green and Grey Society. I do a whole heck of a lot, but I'm a fan of laboring in obscurity. And most of my big gets take place off campus. Ya'll know I like to travel. Many find it weird that I'd much prefer getting things done and people not making a fuss. Yeah, I want my family and friends to know what I've achieved, because it's been because of them. But in all honesty I care less about the rest of the world knowing what I do and why.

I guess it's a big deal to be on G & G. I know its a privilege to be amongst a group I really respect and admire. It's also a huge responsibility because members of the G & G society regularly meet with the college president and are liasions between the college president and the student body.

All that being said I hate award ceremonies. I hate getting up in front of a crowd to have them gawk at me. Don't get me wrong, I can give a speech or work a crowd. I just hate doing it unnecessarily. Maybe my dislike of award ceremonies is why my body clock was all out of wack this morning (that and R.A. duty last night, a post about that forthcoming).

It's so weird that I just typed that I hate being on public display given the fact that I want to be a broadcast journalist. For me it's more about the work. I'm just a vessel, an instrument, a very nice intelligent, articulate, atuned, and nice looking instrument, but an instrument through which a note, a beautiful melodic note can be delivered.

But as my initial thought reminded me sometimes it's not about me. Being at the ceremony was more for my mother. Hence why I yelled out, "Oh shit, my mother." When I initially saw the clock I considered skipping. (I hate going places late, entering late, and drawing attention.) But I knew my mother was coming so I didn't skip. I got up and hauled ass across campus. I know that my mother has always been willing to sacrifice for me to get an education. She's always wanted me to have opportunities which weren't there for her. She always knew and always told me that I wasn't destined to be something less than great. So I went to the ceremony, sat there looked fly, as a tribute to my mother.

So thanks Ma.

I kind of needed to think about all that. All the sacrifices people have made, all the things which have been done, so I can just be me. Cause I know Lately I've been very bitchy about all the things I have to do with regards to leadership. I've been bitchy because I do for others, I SOOOOO believe in the idea of servant leadership. As I told one of my friends I'm not a perfectionist. I don't believe in perfection. I believe in doing a great job without comprimising who I am, and while being of service to others. That's what I believe. It's quite obvious that I must have been doing it all these years, or people wouldn't continually ask me to do things for them.

As the saying goes "Heavy is the head that wears the crown."

I know because of who I am, and where I come from, that I've in a sense being both and annointed and appointed to do great things.

I guess I just need to continue to do flaws and all, frustrations and all, cause things have been done for me.