I Can Tell Your Fortune? You can can you?

So yesterday while working at the school one of my kids decided to play MASH. Ya'll know that little fortune telling game which tells you who you'll marry, where you'll live, what type of career is in your future, how many kids you'll have, what type of living arrangement you'll have, and last but not least the car you'll be driving. Now take note: I am set to marry one of my coworkers Ms. H . The kids seem to think since Ms. H is also African-American, since we go to the same school, since she gives me rides to and from work, and that we chit chat, that we're compatible.

Oh here's the complete rundown:

Wife: Ms. H
Location: Chicago
Career: NFL (Whodathinkit?)
Kids: 10 (Whoa now, hey now, um no)
Living: In A Shack (Wit ten kids and a wife, naw ya'll)
Car: Escalade

I told them thanks, but no thanks, that Mr. Nelson will not be getting married.

One of my friends said I need to stop saying I don't want to get married, cause it will happen. At this point I'm like whatever.

It made me think back to this little diddy which took place on MySpace.

Entrapment (For jameil)
Current mood: contemplative
Top 10 Reasons to Protect Yourself Against Entrapment aka Marriage
10. Autonomy: Freedom is no longer guaranteed, in fact freedom becomes virtually non-existent, your life is no longer yours alone.
9. Workers compenstation: You basically just signed up for another full-time job, and the benefits aren't always there. In fact the co-pay goes sky high.
8. People: Isn't the amount of crazy relatives almost guaranteed to double?
7. Outside Investment: Community property, alimony, split bills, blah, blah, blah. Time, resources, money, blah, blah, blah. What's mine is mine, but you can share if you want to.
6. Space: I need me time, personal space, the freedom to be me. Do I really want to share my personal space?
5. Bored: I do need to be entertained every now and again, and please don't bore me, cause it'll get you cut off.
4. Stress: Do I really feel like dealing with individual problems, work problems, and then coming home to deal with a family. You don't escape marriage, the kids maybe, cause they in school, but now we got cellies, PDA's, blah, blah, blah. Will I get a break?
3.Commitment: I mean I'm looking to be a journo, and a television journo at that. I know what commitment is, but my goodness.
168 hours
60 for work
14- for travel to and fro, just in case
56-sleep
We getting kind of low, and I didn't even eat yet.
2. Responsibilities: Look us journos we're like doctors, we're on call. I mean I'm willing to work, but I mean being responsible for other people. I mean I don't know about all that. Having to take other people into consideration when I make personal, and professional decisions, that's a lot to ask.
1. Fun: I heard it ruins the sex life. I mean it ain't the number one, but goodness gracious, it's of grave concern.

Jasmine said:
hahahaha!!

Ni said:
i am so happy you posted this , i do not need to read, the head line says it all , i always tell people i am miserably happy !! I will not say anymore i am sure you fell me and know me by now !!

CIAO
LOVE ALWAYS

Jameil said:
i'll be damned if i kudo that ish. boy! you obviously ain't neva been in love. all those would go out the window. fun?!! you know what i ain't bout to take up all yo space over here. i'm going to copy and paste that and rebutt it on my own blog. carry on. (foolishness)

And our friend Jameil goes on:

Entrapment (for Chris)
Current mood: appalled
Category: Life
10. Autonomy? What the hell do you need that for? That was sarcasm. But you're as free as you want to be. If you want to have autonomy, you'll have it. no one can stop you from that.
9. worker's comp. ok that one's actually kind of funny. the compensation is in the love boo, the quality of life. come on!
8. people. honey i have more than 30 official first cousins, and probably 15-20 play cousins that i've known all my life, 8 uncles, 4 aunts biologically and another God knows how many. I have so much extended family I don't know what to do with them. What's 30 or 40 more?
7. outside investment. foolishness. doubling your assets and splitting the bill... hello????
6. space. who on earth needs that much space? buy a big house. you are not entitled to be w/the person 24-7! geez!
5 and 1. bored and fun. clearly anyone who bores you and you can't have fun w/you shouldn't be friends with, let alone be married to and make a long term commitment to. *rolling my eyes* clearly.
4. stress. but its someone to share your life with. when everyone else in the world is paired off w/someone who knows them like the back of their hand, who are you gonna talk to? your plant?
3 and 2. again, i'm rolling my eyes at you. commitment and responsibility? and the whole job thing? journalism is probably one of the loneliest fields. i wouldn't be surprised if journalism had one of the highest suicide rates. i know that's morbid, but truly. its not something you want to throw yourself into to the detriment of an actual life. is any job?
quit thinking so negatively. you're too young to be that cynical about marriage. fall in love and you will quickly hush up. then i want you to show her this list and watch her face fall. you will rip it up so fast i'll feel it wherever in the world i am producing the today show (lolol. everytime i see someone in london, mexico, whatever reporting, i'm like see??? i need to be the field producer over there!) and clearly w/all the mushy poems and songs over on your blog, i just knew you were a romantic. i'm so appalled! who is this christopher person and where is cnel!!!!????

I'm looking for him. I'm searching ya'll!