AN APOLOGIST

The other day I came to the realization that too often I am an apologist. I find myself saying sorry for a variety of reasons 1) things not being perfect, 2) fearing I didn't live up to expectations 3) not being able to do more to help someone.

Then I realized that my generous spirit, and my spirit of giving has most certainly done more for people, than it has done to hurt them.

I don't believe in the idea of a perfectionist, and I should know that thats unobtainable. I for one should know that the best is what's expected because I speak so much of giving one's best effort. Who knows? It may be only my internal voice saying it's just not good enough.

I do know I have to stop saying sorry for not be able to do more, before I sincerely on most days give 110% to all that I do.

Why do we beat ourselves up? I really think I do all the work for people. But maybe a "thank you" would let me know someone was grateful. Then again you can't wait around waiting for thank you's which might never come!